Hold My Hand
by homra-kid
Summary: Kuroo was falling, fading and as the feelings stirring within his heart begins to eat him from the inside out, Kei extends his hand out to him in the hopes of catching Kuroo from falling deeper into his demons. AU KuroTsuki, all warnings are inside.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own the characters in this story they belong respectfully to Haruichi Furudate.

**Warning:** Themes of shounen-ai/yaoi/homosexual relationships and whatever, you know all that good stuff, fluffy and also some mild OOC-ness…. If any of this bothers you then you have the option of not reading.

**Music:** "Find You" ft. Matthew Koma & Miriam Bryant by ZEDD

**A/N:** Shojo manga, music and emotionally inspired. The usual y'know? & Happy Birthday Kuroo-chan! I now give you angst and love 8D

X

X

Kuroo's mind felt like complete and utter shit.

There was so much going on around him now, so many responsibilities to uphold and things to consider since it was his last year of high school. Kuroo's brain was gradually deep frying in brain juice, no questions there and at some point he became unaware of what he was doing as he typed up a ridiculous excuse for a text message to his stubborn boyfriend in Miyagi. He wasn't expecting anything much from his headstrong first year of a boyfriend. Tsukishima Kei wasn't exactly the kind of person who was keen on jumping the gun anyways. He seemed to always be too caught up in being organized and prepared for the worst case scenario but it appeared as though Kuroo was in luck this time around when Kei replied an hour later after he dragged his way back tiredly to class.

**Kei:** _I'll be there late._

Kuroo literally had to read the text message from Kei five times before he hurriedly swiped his finger across the touch screen to look at his outbox. What did he say again? Oh yeah… _'Kei, it's been absolute shit this entire week. Are you up for coming over?' _He'd been straightforward, a little too direct if you asked him, considering the lack of mischief there seemed to be behind his words and Kuroo just about choked back at what he'd sent. How embarrassing… Still, from the looks of it, Kei had agreed to visit and he couldn't help but reply as quickly as possible once the teacher had his back turned to the class.

**Kuroo:** _Really? You're coming? What about volleyball practice?_

**Kei:** _Its fine, I'll deal with it on my own terms. Unless you were joking and don't want me to make the trip, say so now, otherwise I'll see you tonight._

_**Kuroo:**__ Yes! Of course I want you to come over!_

_**Kei:**__ Alright then._

After that, the text messages from Kei stopped and Kuroo began to feel a level of anxiousness consume him throughout the rest of the class period up into volleyball practice. He was probably the most distracted out of the entire team. Yaku and Yamamoto thought it was because graduation was around the corner but only Kenma seemed to be aware of what was really at the forefront of his mind and smiled knowingly as a result. It was incredibly obvious to his childhood friend. When the team finally stopped to take a break, Kuroo checked his phone and his heart nearly burst when he found a text message waiting for him from Kei. The blond was on the train to Tokyo.

He really was coming to see him. Kuroo didn't know if he should jump for joy or panic but his worries dwindled away the second when he received a phone call. In those few seconds, the restlessness of Kei's impending arrival melted away into that of pure frustration and Kuroo frowned deeply at the caller ID. It was an incoming call from his mother.

Letting it ring for another five seconds longer, Kuroo finally accepted the call but not without reluctance. "Yo?" He said, grumbling and sounding as disinterested as possible.

The click of the woman's tongue was heard afterwards and he smirked as a result. "Is that anyway to speak to your mother? Where are your manners?" She snapped, clearly annoyed and Kuroo rejoiced a little inside at having stepped on a nerve.

Rolling his eyes, Kuroo's annoyance doubled regardless. He really didn't have any patience for the woman he was forced to call his _mother_. "I won't apologize for not having any manners, _mom_. Now what is it? I'm in the middle of volleyball practice."

"That is not how I raised you to be..." Kuroo heard the woman mutter on the other line and he bit his tongue back hard in order to contain the growing onslaught of insults that were begging to be freed from his mouth. Like she even raised him at all he thought, his mind screaming. Now, Kuroo really was pissed. "But in any case, I'm just letting you know out of the goodness of my heart that I'll be gone for the weekend." She began saying. "Hiroshi is taking me and his kids to the beach and I just wanted to let you know that you'll be home alone until Sunday night."

_'Wow, didn't even bother to invite me, huh?_' Kuroo thought; gripping his phone tightly now. It wasn't like he would have gone anyways if the woman actually did take the time to ask him... And although her words weren't completely surprising to him, it didn't mean that the pain of being left out hurt any less. "That's fine, whatever, I gotta go—I still have practice." He complained hastily, gritting his teeth.

As he pulled his phone away from his ear, he looked down at the screen, watching the seconds pass by. He could still hear her voice—complaining about his behavior but Kuroo really didn't care as he hit the end button. Good riddance to her…

The rest of practice passed by in slow motion after that short but agonizing conversation he had with his so called _mother dearest_. No matter how hard Kuroo spiked the ball and imagined the woman's face on the surface, his frustrations refused to fade away. He needed something more than volleyball to distract him at this point and he was itching with rapidly growing impatience for Kei's arrival—whenever that was going to be. At least they'd have the whole house to themselves, Kuroo tried to remind himself and the second he was free from practice, showered, dressed and packed to go he was speed walking off to the train station to meet the middle blocker from team Karasuno no matter how early it was.

X

X

Kuroo ended up waiting around at the station for an hour no thanks to a delay on Kei's train line. In that time frame though, he spent it texting Kei nonstop, feeling edgy as he tapped his foot on the ground repeatedly whilst standing up the majority of the time until he finally sat himself down at a nearby bench once it was empty.

When the train finally did arrive and he saw Kei making his way towards him, it took a tremendous amount of will power for Kuroo not to tackle the Karasuno first year down and kiss him in front of everyone within their vicinity. Public displays of affection were most often times kept at a minimum for the two and other than holding hands and sneaking in a kiss, it was usually as far as Kei would allow so long as there was minimal eyes around. Today though, Kuroo felt only half considerate of their time and place so he met Kei part of the way, smirking as usual before he aimed a kiss straight for Kei's cheek. It was much safer than his lips and at the same time, Kuroo felt like he was getting what he wanted.

When Kuroo pulled away, he saw the way Kei's cheeks were dusted with pink and in no time he was seen glaring at him but it was far from threatening in Kuroo's mind. In fact, it was rather cute. Kei was embarrassed…

"Did you enjoy the trip?" He asked; slinging an arm around Kei's waist as he began to steer them out of the train station and back to his house, ignoring a few lingering eyes that turned towards them in either surprise or mild disgust at their display.

"It was long and tiring…" Kei complained quietly, shifting his body a little closer to Kuroo's but not by much. "Now that I'm here, what is it that you have in mind for tonight?"

"Hmm… My place, dinner—I'll cook." Kuroo emphasized, wiggling his brows which Kei of course, rolled his eyes at. "And afterwards we can watch a movie, play some games, whatever you want." He added; his voice confident.

"The simplicity is rewarding, I suppose, considering the delay I had to experience." Was all Kei said and to Kuroo, he knew he'd just gained his boyfriend's stamp of approval and smiled as a result. "But next time, be more prepared will you?"

"Yes, your highness." Kuroo replied readily and Kei snorted at him, peeved but the older teen knew deep down that it was just an act to conceal his contentment.

Kuroo had actually half anticipated to see his boyfriend wearing a scowl filled with disappointment for his lack of planning for the evening but when he made a move to peek at Kei, there was no frown to be seen, surprisingly as they walked side by side. Kei, more or less seemed calm, just as he presented himself earlier and Kuroo took it as a good sign. It meant that he had extra patience to spare for him and it led to good things when that happened, so long as he played his cards right of course.

X

X

The trek back to Kuroo's house was a relatively slow one. It was done so purposefully, though Kei wasn't aware of this since Kuroo made them stop along the way for some coffee and a strawberry cake to go—his treat. Kuroo wanted them to take their time but only so that he could dodge running into his mother in the case she was still packing for her weekend beach trip if they got back to the house too quickly. As luck would have it, by the time the couple arrived, Kuroo could see that other than the front lights, his house was completely dark inside and he mentally cheered, feeling delighted as he finally hurried them up to the front door and into the house.

Once inside, they slipped off their shoes, Kuroo locking the door behind them. Dinner seemed to be on their minds, or so Kuroo thought but once they made it to the kitchen and he settled the box with their strawberry cake down on the table, the realization that they would have the whole house to themselves really dawned on him.

Upon discovering the lack of parental supervision, Kei couldn't help but look at Kuroo with a slight frown before the older of the two had him pinned against the kitchen counter. Before Kei could even open his mouth to speak in question of his boyfriend's motives, it became a smashing of lips with Kuroo taking full advantage of their situation. Kei could hardly contain his moans and as he gasped, Kuroo did well to swallow each sound with open mouth kisses that left his boyfriend dizzy.

"W—what happened to making dinner?" Kei asked, kissing between each word. He shouldn't be going along with it, he really shouldn't, he told himself but something in the back of his mind told him that Kuroo needed this rough intimacy.

"Later." Kuroo murmured. "I want to spoil my appetite and skip right down to dessert." He smirked, grinding his hips down on the blonde's.

It really didn't help that Kei was pinned into the counter and he jolted back with a sharp gasp as a result the second Kuroo's clothed hard on pressed into him with a swirl of the other's hips. "Y—you're such a brat." He hissed, his face hot and he struggled to stand, knees buckling under him.

Only half expecting such a response, Kuroo pulled away to take a breath of air, just barely noticing the string of saliva still connecting their lips together. The blonde's words were echoing, intriguing to Kuroo and yet it still strummed something in him regardless.

From Kei's point of view, he was shocked by how blown out Kuroo's dark eyes were. It was captivating still, drawing him in and when he closed his eyes again, kissing Kuroo softly, he felt the other teen stiffen under his touch but only slightly before Kuroo kissed back with more force. Hands caressed over the fabric of their clothes but eventually their fingers intertwined and they held on tightly, the pressure assuring to Kuroo especially.

Kei put up very little protest when Kuroo finally stopped and led them from the kitchen upstairs to his bedroom. The hammering in the Nekoma captain's chest was loud, deafening almost and in his flurry of barging into the room with an unnecessary amount of strength before quite literally throwing Kei onto the bed—the blond said not a single word, accepting of his fate. It made Kuroo's body shiver excitedly, seeing as he was in complete control. After all, it wasn't every day that Kei gave him the reins, so he was going to take as much advantage of the opportunity as possible.

When Kuroo crawled on top of him, his hips pinned down to the mattress, the older teen descended on him, their lips locking for another kiss. They're hardly strangers to sex and it doesn't take long for them to tear out of their clothes, panting heavily as they laid bare for each other.

This was far from love making, as far as they've ever been. Kei wasn't necessarily bothered by it though since they'd had days of straight up fucking. It was a part of what their relationship was originally built on and yet what came out of the ill intent grew into something much more they came to realize. Even if Kuroo spread his legs open in a bruising manner, pushed lube covered fingers into his hole sharply and with less stretch than what was really needed, it couldn't compare to the heaviness lurking behind the old teen's eyes. Whereas Kuroo was usually just as guarded as Kei, he unknowingly let his walls down and the urgency in his actions seemed to read to Kei in a way that he let Kuroo do as he pleased.

Pressing a hand against his mouth, Kei groaned brokenly at the first breach of Kuroo's member into his body before he began to thrust his hips forward. It hurt but Kei kept his gasps muffled, biting his hand at the first sign of pain that shot up his spine. It was a gradual build up and his body screamed until it became a numbing sensation of pleasure that throbbed throughout his veins. He was definitely going to feel the repercussions of spoiling Kuroo rotten in the morning and he made a mental note to force the older teen into a day of servitude to make up for it.

Kuroo, high as ever on lust, thrust into Kei with delight, enjoying the tightness and with each cry the blond released, it only served to fuel Kuroo faster into reaching the end. He was hardly trying to prolong the heat between them, and he rammed himself into Kei repeatedly, gripping his waist tightly as his thumbs pressed themselves deep into the edges of his hips.

_Almost there, so close…_

Moaning loudly now, Kei's hands reached up almost desperately, grasping for Kuroo's shoulder's. Feeling fingertips graze his heated skin and slip from the sweat, Kuroo leaned down, kissing Kei as those same hands reached around his neck and pulled him closer, as close as they could possibly get. With nails scrapping down his damp back and gripping him like a life line, it pushed Kuroo over the edge and as he came, Kei threw his head and cried out one last time, coming hard and spurting across their stomachs.

Like the draw of a curtain, they fell into bliss, enjoying the afterglow of their intercourse with heavy breaths. With Kuroo still pulsing inside of and pressing against his body with a weight of one hundred sixty-six pounds, Kei groaned uncomfortably and with what little strength he had left in him, he pushed the older teen back gently. Caressing the side of Kuroo's sweat ridden face, he took note of the other's exhaustion and leaned up to kiss his forehead.

Kuroo sighed contently, at the feel of Kei's lips, but as he slowly sat up and began to pull himself away, he took note of the slick sound his boyfriend's hole gave, or a lack there of. Looking down slowly, it became a mixture of white and faint lines of pink and red. The sight of the color and rawness of Kei's entrance left Kuroo stiff with mild disbelief. When he crumbled to the side, speechless, he dragged Kei along with him, his chest pressing tightly against the blonde's back as he winded shaky arms around his waist.

Kei could only assume what had been seen, let alone happened but he took it in stride despite Kuroo's obvious guilt. It stung still, but what's done was done, he concluded and he shifted around in the other's arm's until they laid face to face.

"Kei… You're bleeding…" Kuroo mumbled, hiding his face against his neck.

Calm as ever, Kei held the other close, his hand resting on the back of Kuroo's head as he began carding his fingers through dark unruly hair. "I figured as much…" He grimaced. "You feel any better though?"

"No…" Kuroo replied, wincing at the end. "I'm sorry…"

"What's done is done."

Peeking up at him, dark eyes hooded, Kuroo frowned. "I wasn't fair to you though..."

And Kei sighed as a result. "Then be more considerate next time."

"How can you be so calm?" Kuroo asked, brows furrowing.

Looking at him, tired, Kei just shook his head, curling up until their legs tangled, one on top of the other. "I'm not calm." He admitted, surprising Kuroo and they laid there in each other's arms, oblivious to all things outside of the room.

X

X

"After graduation, stay with me for the summer." Kei said suddenly the next morning. They were having breakfast in Kuroo's bed since Kei was far too sore to make the short walk around the house to the kitchen downstairs.

His abrupt request stunned Kuroo and the older teen stared at him, dark eyes wide."Huh?"

"Live in Miyagi with me for the summer and then you can come back to Tokyo for college." Kei said again, only this time with a bit more clarity.

Kuroo then began to frown. "Kei, it isn't that simple."

"I know, but it isn't like you enjoy living in this house either." Kei pointed out, reminding Kuroo that there was very little he liked about his home life.

Soon, his mother would remarry, he'd have a step-father and step siblings but it didn't mean that they would treat him like family. In the entire year his mother had spent seeing the man; Kuroo had very little opportunities to meet him face to face. For all he knew, the man's children probably didn't know a single thing about him and the moment he would be ready to leave for college, there was no doubt in Kuroo's mind that he'd be erased completely from his mother's memory. What good was he when he served as a reminder of the man who cheated and left her?

"It's fine you know?" Kei said, looking down at his lap. "My mom likes you a lot and my dad and Akiteru are cool with you…"

"Kei…"

Slowly, Kei pushed the tray away, crawling slowly until he sat himself down in the other's lap and laid his head against his chest. Pressing an ear above Kuroo's heart, Kei listened to the beating of his heart, hearing the way it pounded and raced the older teen's breathing. It became a comforting sound and Kei closed his eyes, humming softly.

"Just think about it."

X

X

"I still don't know how you managed to rope me into this." Kuroo stretched, yawning tiredly as he sat down next to Kei with a loud thud. The action reminded Kei of a cat and he stared, interested since it was so ironic, considering the Kuroo's high school mascot.

"You did it because you know the idea sounded appealing to you." Kei concluded, taking out a few shirts from the box and placing them down next to him. "Otherwise, you wouldn't be here, would you?"

"Alright, I'll admit it." Kuroo replied, laying his head down on Kei's shoulder. "It is nice."

His response made Kei smile but only lightly as he went back to the task at hand. With a serious face, he returned to unpacking the box of clothes in front of him until it was completely empty. He even went so far as to refold the clothes too; all the while Kuroo rested his head against him, content as ever. If he heard a purr, Kei wouldn't be surprised either.

It wasn't like the older teen was unhappy before but now that he was away from home, from his mother and graduated from high school at long last; Kuroo finally felt like the weight of the world was no longer pushing down on him. Well, not as badly as before and it didn't go unnoticed to Kei. Not at all.

"Ne, are you sure your parent's don't mind?" Kuroo asked, opening his eyes to stare blankly at the wall in front of him.

Of course that part still worried him, Kei figured as much. Rolling his eyes, he turned his head, just enough to peck the other's cheek. "Honestly, how many times do I have to tell you? If that were the case, you wouldn't be here in the first place." He replied, frowning slightly. "You've met them enough to know that they enjoy your company. Now are you going to help me unpack your stuff or what?"

Kei's bluntness was a given, something Kuroo readily accepted the moment they met during Nekoma and Karasuno's first practice match in years despite some of the obvious negatives to the blonde's personality. He was a force Kuroo butted heads with yet embraced with his entirety. Smiling, he then cupped the other's cheek, his thumb stroking across the other's pale skin as they gazed at each other, eye to eye.

"God I'm in love you, Kei."

Narrowing his eyes, Kei clicked his tongue. "You make it sound like you weren't in love with me before…"

"I am in love with you." Kuroo insisted, grinning now and it seemed to only make Kei's irritation worsen. "I always have been." He whined, nuzzling his neck in a feline manner. "Do you love me too?" He asked.

For a moment, Kei seemed to stare at him in silence, but as the stillness carried on longer, Kuroo began to take note of the dusty red that seemed to glow across Kei's cheeks until it reached his ears.

"Yeah, I love you too…" He replied, squeezing his eyes shut.

It was then that Kuroo leaned up and pulling Kei close, he kissed him gently, smiling as lips touched softly several times until Akiteru came up to see how much progress they made in unpacking Kuroo's things.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Not much can be said about Kuroo's home life so I decided to play with that in this AU. If you have any questions or comments, I'll be happy to answer them. Anyways, bye, bye for now!


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